Articles
Coping with Life 17 – The Loss of a Loved One
Coping with Life 17 – The Loss of a Loved One
By Mike Willis
The writer of Hebrews stated an obvious fact, “it is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment” (Heb. 9:27). Years before, Solomon wrote that there is “a time to be born, and a time to die” (Eccl. 3:2) and added that “He has made everything beautiful in its time” (Eccl. 3:11).
Despite these obvious truths, death is difficult for family members and friends to handle. The more intimately one is loved, the more painful the loss. After a marriage extending more than half a century, Abraham’s wife died. The Scripture says, “And Abraham went in to mourn for Sarah and to weep for her” (Gen. 23:2). When Lazarus died, his sisters, Mary and Martha had been mourning his loss four days when Jesus arrived. Many of the Jews had come to console Martha and Mary concerning their brother (John 11:19). John records what happened when Mary came to speak to Jesus, “When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. And he said, ‘Where have you laid him?’ They said to him, ‘Lord, come and see.’ Jesus wept” (John 11:33-35).
The loss of loved ones, regardless of their relationship to you (parent, child, mate, close friend, etc.) leaves an emptiness in one’s soul. And it is natural and normal for one to mourn the loss. Friends who have experienced the loss of a mate tell me that the first year is horrible, with birthdays, holidays, anniversary, etc. stirring memories of how good life had been before the loss. Those who have lost children are wont to say that one never gets over the loss; he must learn to live with it. This is a painful truth.
Not everyone grieves in the same way. Naomi lost her husband and two sons. Her grief was so intense that when she moved back home from Moab to Bethlehem, people said, “Is this Naomi?” The name Naomi means “pleasant.” She said to the people, “Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me. I went away full, and the LORD has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi, when the LORD has testified against me and the Almighty has brought calamity upon me?” (Ruth. 1:19-21). Mara means “bitter.”
But Naomi regained her emotional balance when her daughter-in-law Ruth gave birth to her grandson. The text says, “Then the women said to Naomi, ‘Blessed be the LORD, who has not left you this day without a redeemer, and may his name be renowned in Israel! He shall be to you a restorer of life and a nourisher of your old age, for your daughter-in-law who loves you, who is more to you than seven sons, has given birth to him.’ Then Naomi took the child and laid him on her lap and became his nurse. And the women of the neighborhood gave him a name, saying, ‘A son has been born to Naomi.’ They named him Obed. He was the father of Jesse, the father of David” (Ruth 4:14-17). So hang in there and continue serving the Lord. The Lord who sent His own Son to be your Savior will not forget you either.
